“You block your dreams when you allow your fear to grow bigger than your faith.” … Mary Manin Morrissey
As you know I’m a really positive person … and … I like to think somewhat insightful. But I don’t need to be either of those to know that if I am walking around the world afraid all of the time then I am going to find myself in a lot of unhappy and challenging situations. It’s not only because my inner, fear-ridden, war-torn landscape is reproducing itself all around the outside of me; but also because my perspective of everything will be skewed.
Right up until I hit my early forties I used to be a fear-filled little mouse. I remember my inner child leaping out of my mouth one day during a holistic healing session and offering her opinion of the world … namely … “its verwy, verwy scarwy!” I look back at me and realize how defensive I was and I feel sad for that woman; for having learned to expect life to bring painful experiences to her door. Somewhere along the line I had taken to heart the lesson that “the best defence is a good offense”. Unfortunately the only result of that particular lesson is that I learned to be offensive rather than safe. H-m-m-m that wasn’t the result that I was looking for!
You know what started to turn me around? I bravely hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon and back out – 7 hours to get all the way down and 9 hours to get back up … carrying a 35 pound backpack … having never hiked ANYWHERE before … really!! When I got to the top I decided that if I could do THAT then I could do anything! Bit by bit I stopped letting fear be the determining factor in whether or not I did something, spoke to someone or tackled something new. Bit by bit I let my faith grow bigger than my fears. And bit by bit I watched as my life began to turn around.
It’s been a long journey from there to here and there have been many twists and turns, detours and unexpected side trips. However, I think that I can finally say with confidence that I am finally comfortable in my own skin and totally convinced that Life is my best friend: who never abandons me. Fears still arise … after all I do live in the world and my inner child wasn’t totally mistaken! It’s just that now-a-days I have learned how to look fear in the face and see it for what it is – an old defence mechanism that thinks that the past is still hanging around – waiting to jump up and bite us in the behind. Faith in the caring nature of Life and Its earnest desire for my well-being and happiness allows me to give fear a hug and send it off to the Universal Recycling Depot. I am thrilled to find myself in the wondrous and awesome position wherein Faith and Life are my foundations and fear is simply a by-product of old wounds. Life is good. I feel blessed … and I think that it’s time for a faith-filled, get-down-and-get-joyful, wow-isn’t-Life-GREAT party. Time to get your dancing shoes on Life …
Arinaste (from my heart to your heart)